Early Intervention and Empathy Mindset {For mental health}

What if we identified mental health within our children and youth before they needed the coping mechanisms of today’s modern world.

It’s no secret alcohol and recreational  drugs can be used as coping mechanisms for growing youth and adults.

Opening up the narrative at a young age for open honest and empathic conversation around mental health I believe can help change the way we treat our bodies to numb away our pain.

For me growing up I most likely have suffered from depression and anxiety and many times the symptoms of PTSD. I scored 10/10 in the ACE’s and if you are not familiar check it out. It is basically a list of 10 adverse childhood experiences, second to this I have distinct traumatic memories that I repressed and had to deal with later in life. Which is like a reliving of a trauma my body forgot. I am lucky, I’m not sure why but I feel it, because as much as my mother and father were responsible for my childhood no doubt as I am to my kids. I took some of their traits and enhanced them for greater advantage to me.

My mum taught me to always question, everything , don’t take someone’s authority over your own research and evaluation on a subject, couple this with a traumatic life and you have one individual who assesses the dangers in all settings sometimes to quite extreme levels.  Check out my changing the narrative post, you would have an easy guess the “ You are obsessive “ phrase.

At times this of course debilitated me with anxiety. However from this I have a drive and need to analyse interpret my own and others  behaviour which sees me have exceptional self understanding.  I have shared this also with my kids who can articulate deep feelings within their body and assess situations based on body Autonomy. And so changing my narrative on this trait has been imperative to not living in life long shame.

My father was a jack of all trades he gave anything a go, he was a hard worker and taught me there was nothing I couldn’t do if I  just put the actions in and did it. So with my learning issues that developed due to early trauma, memory loss and C-PTSD from such a young age that was very much undiagnosed I spent a-lot of my life pushing myself to limits to excel as some areas I struggled  in.

However I didn’t have early intervention.

And this was my life I believe as a result.

I binge drank from the age of 13 till 21.  I subjected myself to numerous abusive relationships attempting  to bond with others who got me, understood me and my quirks. I had an extremely damaging narrative.  Due to not being understood for the adaptations I made to survive. Instead of seeking early intervention, support and empathy. I was being told so many harmful and mocking traits.  For eg, no one will love me “i’m crazy” so I found people who would appear to accept my crazy but also feed me this same narrative I was feed form such a young age.  I also still live mostly in a state of hyper arousal and anxiety and so for me this means mainly two things, I assess situations to extremes in my mind, make up worst cause scenarios  and sometimes speak them out loud. I have a sensitivity to sounds pitches that are of certain frequencies.

This is common when in sympathetic arousal.

My narrative was

You are crazy

You are too sensitive

You are a drama queen

I believe we need to change the narrative asap for ourself and others who suffer from mental health or not. Becuase the life long damage holds, sticks and can live with us forever shaping who we are, who are children are and who are partners are after us.

I believe my negative mindset I employed for years coupled with the very damaging later  system of extreme self-development and seeing the best in everyone kept me in damaging situations longer. I may not have blossomed as early as I could have due to not having the support early, the recognition and the empathy to the fact that circumstances I was exposed to.  I was a candidate for mental health illness due to an extremely traumatic childhood.

Intervention in early childhood or youth

I’m currently dealing with a teenage in my family who I believe due to his experiences be that viewed traumatic or not this person still experienced at least up to 4 of the ACE’s which is a warning sign enough for me, to keep my eyes open and support this young person any way I can. We might view trauma as someone who has seen war but research coming out now and for some time over long term health affects of adverse childhood  experiences is huge for physical and mental health. see this video here for more on this research.

Early intervention isn’t to cure an illness or assert there is something  wrong. Early intervention is there in my mind as an important point of understanding to provide empathy to support the young individual. To prevent stigma, and further implications of the narrative and effects that adversity can have in our life.

It’s too easy to look at children and say they are fine, they are happy they are playing, but in their complex minds we are shaping them.

It might be an off the cuff thing and such an awareness to not say things like.

“They are just lazy ” But we really need to asses these situations as they arise without our networks and families in a preventative supportive way. Employing the “life can be hard”  attitude and “suck it up”  for someone who has multiple ACE’S is not going to be a helpful intervention. It’s simply in my opinion denial.

We can read the checklists, we can see the signs.  I believe its how we act with the information and treat the individual that will have the greatest impact on supporting them. For me its about allowing our kids to live to their potential in spite of what was done to them without their permission.

Because our babies come into our world pure and wanting love. I don’t believe in some karmic choice they choose us for the lessons. I don’t believe that we should also  see the positive in every situation. i believe some situations are traumatic and some people process trauma and hold onto it for a lifetime. That is where we need to understand the complexities of individuals.

I believe empathy is our way forward to support early intervention to prevent the narrative that so many of us live with. To create a way forward for our children, by supporting them in their differences, needs, and adaptations. To know they have had to make  adaptations to survive in a world presented to them.

Be that whatever quirks, or traits they come to form.

But I will do best best to undo any narratives, and prevent myself from imprinting any more on myself and them.

Tv x

 

 

 

 

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