I am Anxious-but you can’t use it against me

There is a fine line between admitting our mental health, and others then using this as ammunition to supporting us.

And with the conversations around mental health now opening up, we can only hope we find the balance and dance on this line more often than we have previously.

On one hand admitting things like

  • I get panic attacks and I can say and do slightly irrational things
  • I can get angry when anxious

Can be great information to share with loved ones, yet at the same time can be used against you/us in times that are not appropriate and who even knows when its appropriate to use our mental health as an excuse for behaviour. Its it ever ?

My two statements above are so broad that they can be used in a multitude of ways.

Against or to support me if I am warning an impeding situation that I am not comfortable in.

For eg,


I  am angry about something I  believe has been done to me, someone has wronged me in my eyes. It can be said ” you are just anxious, you are having a moment”

However I believe

anger is important,

It’s important in those of us who have been in situations where our self authority has been taken away and we have given up and become a shadow of ourself, for those who have given up a part of themselves to stay quiet, its helpful for those who don’t know how to say no. Its helpful for those being abused to say enough to get angry moves you away, it activates your fight or flight mechanisms to keep you safe.

The only way we will have hope in subsiding our severe mental health crisis and  supporting our own self back to wellness is self authority. If we feel unsafe, angry or  feel slightly irrational. To accept the state, to asses the situation and make the decision our self keeps us from staying in it longer.

Because until we stop feeling, shame, guilt and all the other feelings that help isolate us and disconnect us, its in the nervous system responses of fight flight and freeze. We will not return back to mental well being, and a nervous system response out of fight and flight, because in a NON fight, flight or freeze repose, there is what is called social engagement. So the theory goes when in this state we feel safe, we don’t feel the anger, the pain and all the extreme feels.


So therefore it makes sense that safety autonomy and self authority or when we feel unsafe is the way back for us.


In Autonomy



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